I’ve realized a lot lately. As much as I want things to be 100% perfect, that will never happen. And that’s fine, that’s life. Nothing is perfect. I try to control things. I want my relationship to be perfect; I don’t want it to end. I don’t want anything to come between us. But I feel as hard as I try to prevent that, I just end up digging myself in a bigger hole.
Every couple has their fights. Even a happily married couple has their ups and downs. And that’s normal. Honestly, what two humans are going to get along perfectly 24/7, especially a male and female? Being overly insecure isn’t going to get you anywhere. If anything, it’ll get you gone.
I’ve never had something so real and so amazing before. I just can’t let anything or anyone come between us. But I need to play my role and stop worrying about everyone else; at this point they are all irrelevant. All that matters is you and I from here on out.
Nobody’s perfect. We’re all full of flaws, but recognizing them and accepting each other for who we really are is what makes us flawless. When you find someone with all the traits and qualities you love, they become flawless. They’re perfect in your eyes due to the simple fact of what they have to offer.
What I don’t understand is how someone can repeatedly put you down and point out your flaws every day of the year. You work your ass off to help them, but that goes unnoticed. You cry and you’re called weak. You open up for the first time ever, and you “talk to much”. You vent, you’re a hypocrite.
I thought maybe I was the one in the wrong. Maybe I was this fucked up individual who didn’t know how to act. I would literally stay awake wondering how to be “normal”. I couldn’t speak on anything to the one I thought I could open up to, because no matter what I said, I would be wrong. Eventually that breaks you down. I’m insecure on my own, I don’t need someone to constantly point out everything that is wrong with me. There is a fine line between constructive criticism and saying demeaning things just to break someone down.
At the end of the day we have to accept each other for who we are. Understand where that person comes from, what that person is going through. Appreciate what they do for you, not just of what you ask, but what they go out of their way to do. Give recognition when it’s needed.
So I hope you find someone who’s “perfect”. Someone who doesn’t cry. Someone who isn’t weak. Someone who doesn’t open up to you. Someone who isn’t a hypocrite. Someone who isn’t immature. Good luck.
The security I feel when I’m in your arms, that feeling I get when I look into your eyes, our heads pressed against each other, staring into your eyes… I just know. I know that you’re everything I need. I know that you’re the one. Nobody else compares to you and the things you do. We may not always agree on certain things but I have to admit, through it all you open my eyes to another view and help me understand the bigger picture.
Although it has been years, this is the beginning. The beginning of forever. We’ll go on this journey, this pursuit of happiness together; hand in hand, side by side. I won’t give up. All the highlights can’t even compare to what we have ahead of us. Just know I’ll never let another close to me; nobody will ever compete with you. I’d never jeopardize what we have and I can’t stress that enough. Just trust me.